I previously wrote a piece on these pages entitled Tragedy is not Enough. In the piece I looked at how if something terrible happens, unless others have a personal experience or stake within it, then the personal impact in minimal, at best, and any possibility of changes stemming from it are gone as soon as the article is read. This week, we will look more at why this is.
The workplace is an unnatural environment. It is an attempt to create a heterogenous environment from a disparate number of individuals. There is usually a veneer of civility, but this is usually a veneer only (not always, some workplaces are truly delightful to be in).
Workplaces are often created by the most dominant individuals. This usually equates not to the best and brightest, those with a true aptitude for compassion, but rather those who are the most boisterous and those who gossip the most as by doing so they can hide their insecurities (ah, that word again!) and create an environment for them at the expense of others. Recently, there has been a rise in people working away from the workplace. This, for some, has been a blessing. For others, not so. However, the perceptions of these are very different as we will see in the examples below:
- Person A is an introvert and does not feel comfortable in the office environment. Person A is gossiped about, insulted behind their back, and told that they have to make more effort to fit in.
- Person B is an extrovert and needs attention to be happy, the kind who speaks because they have to say something even when they have nothing to say. Person B says they are uncomfortable being away from the office environment. People say how sad it is that Person B cannot be in their natural habitat where they can thrive.
Can you see the difference? Essentially, we have two situations which are the same but reversed. One is an introvert uncomfortable in the environment, the other is an extrovert uncomfortable in the environment. However, the reaction to these two are very different. One is seen as having a problem and the other is seen as being the problem.
Yet this can change, no? With people being situated in environments which are contrary to their nature, surely, they can understand how difficult and unpleasant it is for them, so, post hoc ergo propter hoc, they can develop empathy for those in the same situation, just inverted! Unfortunately, as you have probably guessed, tragedy for others does not equate to empathy from others and suffering for the self rarely translates into analysis of the situation and understanding and learning so as people fail to understand their own situation, just complain and whine about it whilst getting sympathy from those who think alike. There is no cognitive or emotional development and thusly the suffering of self does not translate into empathy for others, it only goes to become something that, as a monkey with a computer, they can wave it around, use it as a weapon against others whilst they, as badly trained opera singers, stand on their stage which no one can see bleating ‘Me Me Meeeee’ as the sheep they are.
This is not confined to the geographic location of one’s self, it also relates to other things which are incredibly toxic and have a high personal cost. The amount of suicides and mental health problems caused by bullying and gossiping is concerning. Often, those who carry out such behaviours like to moan about how everyone is mean to them as an attempt to a) make themselves feel better (doesn’t work or they wouldn’t keep having to do it), b) make themselves appear to be the victims, c) avoid being judged themselves by others, and d) (there are many more) avoid having to judge themselves.
Just think, if people of this ilk had the emotional intelligence to develop empathy then they would be able to better emote with themselves, and so, as with most tragedies, the opportunity for the world to grow and become a place where unnecessary suffering is lessoned, falls by the wayside as people are far too concerned with tying to hide their insecurities by attacking others for the very flaws they attempt to hide.
‘till next time
thegreaterfool2016 